Good afternoon 😊
Here comes another video , I really wish you a wonderful and peaceful day 😊
A lot has been going on in my life but all for the best .
I have finished writing my book and as soon as that has happened, I realised that this book is just short cut of the story . I tried to hide most of the things and basically make it seem like it was all good and there is actually nothing wrong with what has happened etc .
There was so many eye opening things, and the fact that I was trying to hide it , is even worse . I don’t plan to publish this version as it’s definitely not the story I’d like people to see. I want it to be raw and real , and exactly as it was , the the stuff that has happened and the issues, childhood trauma etc .
The book will be posted under pen name, i dont want to make anyone’s life hard whatsoever. I just want to put it out there without filter.
For others to know , they not alone . That society is what it is . For others to realise that everyone can heal as long as there is a will to do it. That life is not happening against us . It teaches us everyday, and it is up from us, whether we will learn the lesson on the first time or maybe we will have to go through the same stuff 20 times during our life .
Hope you all have a wonderful day 😊
Yesterday I have had very lazy but somehow productive day … I still wonder , how the heck did I manage to do all I did , even though I had my sister over basically all day, since we were waiting for University to call in regards to her wanting to start studying Business degree.
Anyway I was a little blunt and I actually told her that I love being on my own . To which she of course got offended a bit ( I bet she just pretend ) she loves to make me feel guilty lol
Thank God it does not happen anymore . If I think im being honest ,then you have no choice but accept it and understand. I’m introvert and I simply love ME TIME ! Over anything!
Anyway it’s Friday and i plan to make the most of this weekend, I hope you will enjoy yourself , keep smiling and stay at peace 😊
Beautiful sunny day
Soon we are going to celebrate Easter 🐣
But now I lay on bed thinking how I came to the point where I Love someone so much , that I don’t mind them being happy without me.
I know Love is a big word , this is something I rather can’t explain or understand with my mind .
But my heart know ….
I don’t feel heartbroken, I don’t feel like I was rejected or unwanted.
I see things from completely different perspective now and I’m grateful for the opportunity to meet someone who shaked my soul so deep.
Some things are not for us to understand but simply feel . I suppose It was all meant to teach me what real love is . No judging, no jealous and possessive, not pushy and self centred .
Reminder for all of us… love does not mean , that someone belongs to you, you not an owner of someone else , don’t try to change the other person either. If you can’t love them as they are.,Just let them go, because they not meant for you .
I totally feel like I am ready to move forward and allow myself to dive deep into loving myself and I know there is someone out there , who is my perfect match.
Today I have realised that the more I learn ,the less I know.
Also the more of a understanding I have within myself, the less I need to be around other people. And my own company is absolutely the best .
I see why now , I have put myself on hold and didn’t want to go through that all healing, deep inside I must have knows I’m just not ready , i wasn’t ready two years ago even in the slightest… which is crazy to think , before I thought i know life and now … i know nothing but that i want to be happy, at peace and content .Things I see and understand now , I would reject without a thought in the past . Now it is what it is , because its truly just our perception and opinions.
Love Honorata x ❤️
Dating can be fun
Well if you have very low expectations or no expectations whatsoever is even funnier .
People think you a clown and take advantage of you
Everything changes however, when you start to respect yourself and don’t chase everyone who comes your way lol
Some people will even go as far as manipulating you into having Netflix and chill and of course making nothing of it . However the plan is well known and simple.
Get that meat , use it and abuse it and then of course play hard to get and ghost poor soul, who now think you have a connection. No you dont ! You just chosen to have sex with random dude in hope of romantic relationship, but that’s something you read in books, in real life nobody is that romantic. We all fucked up to some extent and don’t know how to deal with our own feelings so we play it tough and hurt everyone including ourselves.
Then we lie a bit and play games… ha ha ha
Yeah I might be a little bit bitter .
No i wasn’t hurt by anyone recently, it’s just an experience from the past.
I do shadow work so pardon me . Of course you might not agree with me .
Not that I care . I truly don’t give a fuck.
At the end of the day . We self centred and only focused on our own needs .
Yes yes that’s how we are most of the time. You can’t make me think otherwise. I’m one of you .